How to:Getting drinking water

So, this is the scenario.

You wake up to find your trapped in the jungle somehow and all around you there is lots of foliage! You become very thirsty but only happen to have a plastic bag and an elastic band. Now I know what your thinking, bag over the head...elastic band = goodbye cruel world?

NO! Stop thinking that and start worrying about how the hell you woke up to find yourself in the jungle. Then follow this guide to get water to drink.

You will need

Plastic bag

Elastic band

Tree/Bush/Plant

Balaclava (Because in the jungle you don't want any Bonobos seeing you)

Step 1

Seeing as you may have awoken in a jungle you should probably think back and wonder if you've ingested any psychoactive substances recently. If you have count yourself lucky that it's not really happening! And don't take drugs again.

Step 2

Look for a nice leafy part of your chosen tree and put the bag over it.

Step 3

Secure the bag at the bottom with the elastic band!

At this point you should straighten out the bag a little bit so it has an end in which water can collect.

Step 4

Softly softly catchee monkey. You'll have to wait a while depending on how hot it is where you are, the hotter it is the more the plants going to aerobically respirate and give you your beloved water vapour.

Step 5

Drink it!


This took a few hours to collect, if I'd left it for half a day or so quite a lot would of been collected, if you had lots of bags you could do this loads and have a tree bag party!

So! Now you know what to do if you ever find yourself in a really really strange situation.

WARNING: Some things described on this site are potentially dangerous/illegal. The writers of this site assume no responsibility for the consequences that may result from attempting the activities described here.

Want to submit an article? Email it to adventuresandmadness

How to:Magic bag

The famous “magic bag”

Magic bags have been the tool of shoplifters and thieves alike for years due to the inexpensive materials needed to make one and the effectiveness they have.

So what is it?

Basically a magic bag acts as a Farady Cage, this means that no electrical signals can penetrate the outer “cage”. In most if not all stores worldwide they use RFID scanners at the doors with AM and EM sensors being less common. You’ve probably seen these tags attached to most important or expensive items. But that’s not really important! The magic bag blogs all these signals from getting to the item so no alarm goes off when you leave the store.

In caveman terms...Put things with tags still on in bag! Walk out store! No alarm goes off!

You will need:

Aluminium foil


Tape


Envelope (you can use a bigger size to fit bigger things in)


Scissors


Mobile Phone(optional but good for testing)

First put a layer of tape around the container you’ve chosen to use, this will stop the foil from sliding about a bit.


Next is the longgg and borrrrring part, but it’s worth it, trust me.
(Don’t trust strangers, but trust me on this one.)

You have to start to cover your container in foil, once you’ve done about 5 layers of foil, tape around it all again just to keep it in place and have less chance of ripping and breaking your fortress of hidden belongings. (I’ve already started the next layer in this picture.)



Now for the bad news, before the year 2000 security systems were less advanced and you only needed 4 or 5 layers to fool most systems, now you need pretty much at least 30 layers of foil all over your whole container to be sure of fooling the sensors. This is going to take a long time to cut the foil to size but once it’s done if you choose to “borrow” something on a permanent basis, you won’t get caught and won’t have to worry about taking off those annoying tags.

So after wrapping those first 5 layers, become friends with your foil and learn to cherish it, it will serve you well in the future, but now you have to realise that the foil hates you and is going to become your worst enemy until your done.



Next you have to do 5 more layers and tape to secure the container and do this until you have at least 30 layers to be sure. (Now you can see why I picked a small envelope.)

Once your done, you can test it by putting your mobile phone in the pack and ringing it from another phone, if it doesn’t ring you’ve done enough to block the signal, this is a good sign, but store scanners are far stronger so it’s just an indicator that there are no leaks. If the phone does ring, cover it in some more foil and try again.

Congratulations on making your magic bag! If done correctly your toy elephant will be there to compliment you, your hands should now smell of metal and you probably never want to see your foil again, but in your darkest moments you’ll find it will comfort you once more... yeah not really.

WARNING: Some things described on this site are potentially dangerous/illegal. The writers of this site assume no responsibility for the consequences that may result from attempting the activities described here.

Want to submit an article? Email it to adventuresandmadness